Every Thursday is Goat-Free Simplicity day at Living Behind the Curve.

Do you remember learning how to write in school? You probably don’t, since it didn’t exactly happen in one day. For the first six or seven years, you’re locked in mortal combat with the English language, fighting to cram more and more meaning and information into your writing. You start out seeing Jane run, then Jane starts running quickly towards a pretty blue flower, and finally Jane rushes to try to stop Dick from picking a flower, because she doesn’t want to see such a beautiful thing die.

Have you read a book report written by an 8 year old lately? Here’s an example:

Arthur’s Computer Disaster

Written and illustrated by Marc Brown
Reviewed by Aleksy S. (age 9) and Leslie G. (age

Arthur’s Computer Disaster is about Arthur and his friend Buster who came to his house. They wanted to play the game Deep Dark Sea. His mom said not to touch the computer because she needed it for her work. Arthur did not listen and thought he broke the computer. Arthur was very upset. We liked the story because it teaches you a lesson. We liked it because it will help children to understand not to touch things when their parents say not to. We thought it was funny when D.W. told Arthur he was in trouble.

We thought it was humorous because she always wants everyone to get into trouble. We liked D.W. because she thinks she is a queen. We also enjoyed the illustrations because they were colorful and alive. We recommend this book to students that like to read books about Arthur. We think children that have computers should read this book too.

Aleksy S. and Leslie G. are students in Mrs. Burke’s Third Grade Computer Club
2003-2004

All sorts of stuff going on in there, huh? By my count, there are nine distinct ideas in this report; out of thirteen sentences, 5 are a plot summary, and the remaining eight each hold a different idea. Talk about jam-packed with information! If you check out the website and read more by kids in the same age range, you’ll see that this is a pretty typical example.

Around 6th grade, the focus starts to change. Instead of hammering as much information as you can into what you write, your teachers begin to ask you to focus. You begin learning how to write essays, and how to explore a given topic. Themes and definitions become more narrowly defined. Simple summary book reports turn into essays on political themes from Romeo and Juliet, which in turn become analyses of the implications of the Comstock Act, which finally resolve into senior projects that include 50 page research papers on how the Beatles directly influenced the Ford administration and helped end the Vietnam War.

It’s a bit of a paradox, but for your writing to become more sophisticated and complex, you need to focus and simplify your message. Ideally, before 6th grade, broad and complicated; after 6th grade, focused and simple. So, is it any wonder that in a nation where the written discourse, on average, takes place on about a 5th grade reading level, we find a society that feels nearly crippled by the chaos in their everyday lives?*

Perhaps it’s a stretch, or a metaphor, or maybe it’s a truism of the “as above, so below” variety. I don’t think it matters all that much, really, but it’s an interesting exercise to imagine your day as an essay. Where are your superfluous adjectives cluttering up your passage? How much time did you get to spend on the subjects that are really important to you? Is there anywhere that you’re using three words where one would do?

Does your life resemble a nuanced exposition, or a list of sequential events?

*Ok, I admit it’s a stretch. This whole idea is based entirely on my memory of school, and casting about on the Internet for guidelines. The general consensus seems to be that functional literacy is 6th grade, the US average reading level is 7th grade, high school grads score 8th grade, and college grads work on a 10th grade level. The Wall Street Journal and New York Times hover between 11th and 12th grade. Best-selling books and most newspapers average between 4th and 6th grade level. (In case you were curious, this post ranks at around 7th grade. Find out how your writing measures up here.)